Status Report

This is an actual status report sent to my friend last friday.
Status: *Company Name Removed - Grand Rapids, MI.

Date: October 7, 2005

There has been little progress here today since our call. Here is the reason:


Gail came in to reiterate the hard work needed by all on the team. Linda (from the UK) got pissed and started yelling at Gail because she didn't want to work as hard as Gail. Gail and Linda almost came to blows in the middle of the office here instead opting for lots of screaming and cussing. Meanwhile, I'm sitting in a corner mapping collected attributes against the CMDB structure. So, Linda is now nowhere to be found and Gail is someplace filling out an HR report.

Here is what I didn't know:

1. Linda is the fiancée of one of the head IT execs in the UK. He apparently is about 30 years older and makes tons of money.
2. Linda is "very good friends" with someone here on Gail's team and has been out with him every night this week.
3. Linda has been telling her fiancé that Gail is forcing her to work 20 hour days so that he won't wonder where she is in the middle of the night.
4. The only reason that Linda is on this project, from Linda's perspective, is to visit the US for a bit of "extracurricular fun"
5. I believe that Linda's involvement on the team is coming to an abrupt end and she will be going back to the UK (unless, of course, her fiancé changes the locks)
6. Gail is in the middle of trying to explain this extremely sticky situation that has now all come to light in front of the entire Hewlitt Packard staff. Therefore, she's a little busy.

So, this has been an extremely drama filled afternoon and perhaps one of the most uncomfortable positions I've been in at a client site. When you speak to Gail, please be aware of the dynamics here but try not to bring up any names if you can help it.

I'll be on a plane headed back to Houston tonight unless the police show up and want statements later!